I have another confession to make – I have been wanting to write a book.
This started when I gave birth to Santi.
There was a voice that always woke me up in the middle of the night, telling me to proclaim my testimony for all the blessings I have received.
But writing this book has been a struggle. I have started but I couldn’t, for the life of me, just complete it. I have the outline of the book. I know how it pans out. But the words just don’t flow.
This was in 2016.
Then January 2017 came and I was again confronted with a life-changing experience that rocked me to my core.
There I was, with an 8-month old son, the child we have prayed for and waited for four years and after two miscarriages, and I was on the verge of almost losing his father in a major open-heart surgery (this is another long story I am yet to write) –
My world collapsed but my God did not disappoint.
He gave Edzel gastroenteritis so I could bring him to the hospital. And what a blessing in disguise it really was! Had it been one week after, Edzel could have died of heart failure.
And so, there I was again, confronted with that incessant feeling to write the pages of that book again. And this is how it starts…
I am not a religious person. The truth is, I was agnostic for most part of my adult life. I was a perfect example of God’s prodigal daughter.
I started as any child in a Catholic household would start his faith. I prayed the Rosary every six in the evening with my Papa. I attended Catechism classes and participated in Flores de Mayo every summer. I was an angel every Holy Week during the Salubong.
I went to a Catholic school in my secondary years and joined practically every church activity, from being a lector to a commentator to being a member of our Church choir. During our music class, I even proudly sang the song, “Jesus, My Friend” when all of the other performers rocked the class with their pop ensemble. It was embarrassing, but hey, anything for Him, right?
But my faith was devoured when I stepped on my third year in high school in a debate class.
I was tasked to take a stance against celibacy and Catholicism. To arm myself with a solid defense, I had to read every book that contradicted my Catholic faith. It questioned the foundations I believed in and rocked me to my spiritual core. I read about the attacks against Mary and the saints, of the Catholic dogmas and all the religious traditions. I cannot remember if I won the debate. All I know is that, I have gone astray after that class.
From that point in my life, I was wishy-washy with what I believed in.
I knew that there was a Higher Being. I just did not know how to connect with Him anymore. I was fourteen and my faith was shattered for decades after that. It did not help that I spent most of my adult life with people who are also far from being spiritual. I was a lost earthly soul, enjoying my vices and getting satisfaction from worldly things.
But God had other plans for me and this is what I want to share in this book.
He has manifested Himself in such a powerful way that my life has turned around completely. I am sharing with you seven moments in my life that I had a powerful encounter with God and how this has changed my life forever. Because of these experiences, I have come full circle and went back to my faith – even much stronger than how it was founded.
I hope that I can look at you straight in the eye and tell you a reason why I am writing this book. I hope I can give you an answer that will move you to tears.
I can’t.
Because I don’t have an answer.
All I know is that there is a voice that has been waking me up in the middle of the night since my little miracle, Santiago, was born. To do what I had promised to do – proclaim the grace that He has given my family and be a testament that He exists and that He is real.
I am writing my story because this is the ministry that I am most familiar with. I am writing my story because this is the only way that I can give back a little of the immense blessing that He has given our household over the years.
To God be the glory.
I wish I could finish this book by next year. For now, God is still revealing another great miracle as of this moment (watch out for this soon).
In the meantime, I hope you could give me some feedback on my draft prologue of this project.
Toodles, loves!
