2014 is finally over. This has been a great turning point in my life. I was thrown off my universe when I was diagnosed with APAS. I had to undergo a lot of treatments. I had to quit my job. I would have never imagined to be in this place but I could never be grateful at where I am now. If you look at it on an outsider’s point of view, you could say that this could have been my worst year. But in truth, I am eternally grateful to the year that has passed. This is the year of my undoing and I share with you 14 lessons I have learned:
- When life gives you two roads to take, and both roads can make you happy, choose the one that involves family. Career can make you happy. Money can make you happy. Fame can make you happy. But all these things won’t keep you warm and fuzzy at night. These things can’t love you back, not unconditionally, that is. Family always should come first. That is the rule I have set on myself last year.
- Faith keeps marriage alive. At the early part of our marriage, Edzel and I didn’t to go to church. Faith was something we didn’t talk about. It was not an important part of our marriage. But I am so glad that it is not the case now. Our faith, our religion keeps us stronger and closer. And going to Church has become our weekly tradition (as should be). Marriage is a tripartite thing: you, your spouse and God. This was the thing we had to remember.
- There is pleasure in pain. I am not a masochist. But yes, there could be pleasure in pain, given the right reasons. The pain of my injections when I was undergoing my LIT and the pain when I had to quit work — all these for a pleasure of having wanting a baby.
- Contrary to popular belief, it is hard to make a baby. It pains me to hear about people who want to get rid of a fetus inside their belly. There are so many of us who have a realllyyy hard time conceiving. If you have a child, you are soooo blessed. No matter what your circumstance is, a child is always a blessing and you should be eternally grateful.
- A dog can make your life much colorful. When I was younger, I had so many pets. I had rabbits, a monkey, white mice, dogs, fish, chickens, cats. This seems normal in a provincial setting. When I lived in the city, having a pet seemed crazy. But when Edzel and I had Sachi, we were never the same. Sachi brings an additional color in our house. She always knows how to make you feel loved and appreciated. And what they say is true: nothing can love you as much as a dog would.
- It is okay not to have many friends. Friends come and go. As you grow older, it has become more and more difficult to keep friends. Everyone seems to have an issue with everything. In my younger years, I felt bad when people didn’t like me. Now, I just shrug it off. You can never be liked by everyone and those who don’t… well, they just don’t. What I have realized more and more is that old friends are the ones that never become stale. The friendship I have with my college and high school best friends has proven this true time and time again.
- Life propels you in so many directions to explore your limits. And then one day, it brings you back to the one thing you love most when you were a kid. I have headed Marketing for Canon for a time. I have headed Corporate Communications for the same company for a time. I have learned a lot and known myself because of those career paths. I was at the right place and that right time. And now, here I am. Back at writing – something I did (and loved) when I was around six years old up until college. Something tells me that I am. at this point in time in my life, at the right place.
- You can make writing a living. Confucius once said, “Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.”
- Money is not everything. When I was working, I have never had a serious thought about money. I spent left and right and it didn’t matter whether I saved or not. When I had to quit my job, this was my primary concern. How do I survive? I had financial obligations, bills to pay. But luckily, here I am. Three months of being out of the corporate world and I am still striving. Of course, I am quite lucky that Edzel was more than willing to take care of almost everything but we have transformed our lifestyle a lot. We have fewer night-outs. I’ve learned to check out book sales (hehe), learned how to cook. But despite all these, it is not bad at all.
- No matter what your age is, you can always learn if you want to. There is no truth in the saying, you can’t teach old dogs new tricks. Even Mythbusters agree with me. I learned how to drive just two years ago. I am learning how to cook and bake. It is never too late. This year, yoga will be something I want to learn and be serious with.
- You can de-clutter your life. I used to struggle with de-cluttering my condo, my office space, everything! But I have learned a very effective trick, the one-minute rule from Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project: push yourself to do any chore that takes less than one minute. Throw away the junk mail, close the cabinet door, put your dirty socks in the hamper, hang up your wet towel. For her other clutter-busting tips, check here >>
- There will be times when the pain of the past will resurface. And it will remind us of that unwanted emotion again. Feel it. But do not dwell in it. It was what it was. It is what it is. I have a really bad memory but not everything I can forget. There were situations that broke my spirit and sometimes, they come back and haunt you unexpectedly. I get my episodes but I have become better at dealing with my skeletons. All this because of a mindset that I have when I started 2014 – the attitude of gratitude and always wanting to be happy.
- There will always be challenges. But we have to soldier on. This is called life. I’d rather have the challenges, rise from it and be stronger than to be dead. Don’t you?
- Dreams do come true. I had my “personal encounter” with my hero and inspiration, Paulo Coelho. It is the Universe conspiring. That couldn’t get any better than that.
So to you, 2014, I bid farewell! We had a good run. Thank you for everything. And 2015, you are very much welcome to amaze me. 🙂
P.S. How about you, loves? What was your 2014 like?
xx,
Balot
