I remember it so clearly, that day when my doctor told me I possibly have APAS.

That was the day after I have gone through my second miscarriage. The pain of losing my Basti, my 10-week old son, was too much to bear and there I was, being told that I might have this APAS condition that was causing my recurrent losses.

I was sooo lost.

What the hell was APAS and why did I only hear about it for the first time, that time?

Days after I went home, I spiraled into endless research about the condition, looking for answers. If you are in that place right now, let me give you a big hug. But more than that, let me give you a little bit of unsolicited advice:

1. Pause. When I first found out about APAS, I hated the feeling that I did not know about the condition so I went down the rabbit hole, researching about the condition. I think this is human nature. We seek to know the things that are unknown to us. But before you do, blood sister, pause. Your losses are a big thing. It effs you up not only physically but emotionally and psychologically. So take it easy, and breathe. Grieve if you must but more than anything else, rest. The journey will be long. And you’d need all the strength you could get.
2. Find the best doctors. In this journey, it is important to find doctors who specialize in this condition because they can see the slightest change in your future pregnancies and can quickly adopt methods to address your situation. You can join our Facebook support group at www.facebook.com/groups/allaboutapasandrid to see who are the doctors handling cases as ours.
3. Test comprehensively. Many are misinformed about APAS, even some doctors. APAS is only one out of five categories of repro-immune disorders. Many are found negative to have APAS and continue with their pregnancy, only to lose it again because they find out later they are positive for other categories. This is also the reason why #2 above is every important.
4. Find a support group. Your journey will be special so find a support group that will help you in this special time. This could be close friends and family or even online Facebook groups whose members can share how they were able to overcome the burden that comes with the condition.
5. Pray. Pray when it doesn’t happen. Pray when it happens. Children are gifts from heaven and we can only do what is humanly possible to have them. Treatments may or may not give you a child but the Heavens sure can.

I hope that this somehow, helps you at this trying time. If you have any questions, send me a message or join me in the RID support group together with the rest of our blood sisters.

Happy weekend, love!